Posted by: Jenny | February 21, 2008

Judgy vs Not Judgy

I am pretty judgy.  When I see your toddler running around in the store with soda pop in a bottle, I totally judge you.  When your toddler throws himself down on the pavement in the Target parking lot, I totally don’t judge you, as I just pulled mine off the ground.  When your kids are screaming and running through the aisle hitting each other, I judge you.   When your child is crying and upset because it is late and you have to get your homework done in the library, I don’t judge you, ’cause I know it sucks that you are in a different situation than 96% of the people around you.   So  yeah I am judgy.  But being a parent has brought more perspective to at least parts of things I am judgy about.  You can’t expect kids not to be kids.  I know that there are situations and reasons for most things that parents do, and that tons of stuff go on behind the scenes of what you see in public.  So I guess that I recently figured out that I don’t expect kids not to be kids, but I do expect parents to be parents, and adults to be adults.   But sometimes that is even too much to ask for.

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Responses

  1. Grocery stores are exempt from “judging”. Especially if there is one parent in the store and multiple children. It really is an impossible situation and the excessive stimulus of the grocery store can be overwhelming for both parents and kids.

    It is one scenario with one kid, but the world changes when there are two and they are both between 3 and 5.

  2. Making sense of the rough times of parenting is realizing all the other things that affect parenting. Love Mom

  3. I’m with you – I understand things now that I didn’t before. Like if you give in to the tantrum at target just this once, you are asking for about 5 million more. But where I do judge is the resturants, where I go without my child and then have to deal with people’s kids running and screaming while the parents ignore them. This isn’t at mcdonalds or perkins, this is a nice place. So parents need to be parents and that sometimes means leaving before you want to, or brining toys to occupy your children and possibly taking the time to teach your children manners. Some of these kids are totally old enough! I just remember those few moments where you realised that you crossed the line with mom – like when you wouldn’t put on the seatbelt and she really stopped the car or you left the cart of groceries and didn’t have a good dinner or milk because you didn’t behave well at the store and boy howdy you knew that you had embarassed your mom/dad and you never did it again. What happened to those days? (and yes I understand this does not apply to those kids who are too young to understand the concept)

    Wow this is long, but I think my funniest was some mom was on the cell phone and her maybe 3 year old was sucking crap out of the cracks on the sidewalk while walking into target! I actaully told the kid to stop and the mom didn’t even notice a stranger talking to the child that was tugging on her arm….hang up and parent….this is your childs life that you are missing.


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